You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
