she was so not down for the gang bang
Tell her she can't have a vagina
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
the liver wants what the liver wants
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
