you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I have feelings that need drinking.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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