BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
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