i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize
