Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Randomize
