these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
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