I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
My liver just had a heart attack.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Randomize