I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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