Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
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