I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
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