we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
