I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Randomize