Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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