when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
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