if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Randomize
