But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Randomize
