Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
