it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
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