i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Randomize
