what if every blade of grass was a penis?
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
How external is "for external use only"?
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
