I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
Randomize
