there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
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