Taylor Swift is so right about you.
ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
