OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
