Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
it's like that moment that you're driving and realize you're lost except instead of driving i'm just sitting here in my living room drunk, eating a plate of sausages, drinking red wine and just thinking "i'm going to be 28 this year. i know people who are married, with beautiful and well behaved children. where was the wrong turn?"
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
Randomize
