you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
you had me at cake vodka
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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