i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Randomize
