I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
