Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
