google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
All the doctor said was why
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