I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize
