Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
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