Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
