is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
