More tranny stories later!
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
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