This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
i will never coherently bang her
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
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