ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Randomize