3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize
