the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
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