HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Randomize