the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Randomize
