Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
His nipple licking is glorious
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