I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
The struggles of a small town man whore
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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