awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
Randomize
