oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
Randomize
