You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
its not stalking. its research.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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