Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
