spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Randomize
