i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
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